Dream a Little Dream

If I logged the number of hours I spend daydreaming in a day, I am guessing that at least 30 percent of my awake-time is dedicated to "what might have been" or "what could be" or, in some cases, "what will never be."

I daydream a lot. I daydream about little things…I daydream about big things…I daydream about different things…I daydream about the same things over and over.

One of the things that I really think about a lot is what are famous people doing all day while I'm at work? I mean, where is Jessica Simpson right now? What is Jennifer Anniston going to eat for lunch? Now, I have never been obsessed with celebrities per se. I have been on planes and eaten in restaurants with them (well, not with them, but while they were in the same space). Anyway, it didn't really faze me. However, their lifestyles fascinate me.

Understand, though, it's not their money that captivates me; it's their financial freedom – the endless opportunities that their money essentially provides. I am supposing that sounds like the same thing, but it is not. I daydream about these celebrities because I would just like to know the feeling of getting the things I want without giving up something else to do so. What would it be like to buy every pair of shoes I want? What would it be like to drop the money for that Marc Jacobs that I have obsessed over for months and never miss the cash? What would it feel like to spoil my family and friends with trinkets and trips on a regular basis? What would it be like to hand over $100,000 to the charity of choice just because that's what I want to do today?

I know that someone out there is already dying to play devil's advocate by presenting the side of the star-studded society that is forced to run from the paparazzi and read about their daily activities in The National Enquirer. Yes, that is a downside to being famous, I guess. Again, I am not saying that I want to be famous in a celebrity entertainment kind of way. I'd much rather be famous in a "Look How Much She's Accomplished for Others" kind of way – an international philanthropist, a world improver, a servant to my global community.

The problem is, in order to be all those things, I need the money of the movie stars. And that isn't ever going to happen. Thus, the reason I spend so much time daydreaming about stars like Matthew McConaughey…actually, that's not true. THAT daydream has nothing to do with money:)

Are Half-Truths Whole Lies?

Telling the truth comes so naturally to some people. Some people, like me, spill so many details about my daily life that the chance of my lying is zero to none-- simply because no one could make up so much crap with the ability to recall it in the same way, time and time again, unless it is indeed true.

On the other hand, lying comes very naturally to others. Unfortunately, many chronic liars do not see themselves as such. Or, ironically enough, they lie about lying.

Most people will agree on the fact that a total fabrication of a story is indeed a lie. After this, however, the lines are not so easily drawn. Why? The problem with admitting that you are a liar is directly related to self-justification. Nothing alters the facts faster than self-justification.

Because of this attempt to create logical support for the reason one lies, several different categories of liars have evolved from the Blatant Liar. Now, we have the Half-Truth Liar, the Convenience Liar, the Exaggeration Liar, the Hindsight Liar and the Omission Liar. (For full descriptions of these categories, go to the bottom of this page.) Other people have coined terms such as "Mercy Lies" and the famous "Little White Lie." Still the question remains, is there a point where a lie is undeniably labeled as such other than for the blatant fabrication of facts?

Philosopher Immanuel Kant said that truth was subjective, yet he thought lies of all types were bad. So is there a clear, concise point where truth is defined and lying identified?

In the attempt to define truth and label a lie, some questions should be asked--
*To what extent is truth really truth?
*Is omission of details the same as fabrication of them?
*What is the difference in half truths and whole lies?
*Can we accept only partial facts if all those facts are indeed completely true?

A general problem results from the lack of universal acceptance of a single definition of "lying." Therefore, there is also a specific problem between two people, when for the sake of a relationship, need to have the same approach to identifying what is true. For if one believes that the omission of facts does not automatically define a lie while the other person believes it does, then conflict is automatically created.

My own conclusion is that while there is no universal definition, it is still very important that truth's definition be the same if only between two specific people. Therefore, it is extremely important for the sake of relationships--romantic or otherwise--that what constitutes a lie be defined. For if those two people have distinctly different interpretations of what constitutes a lie, then one of them will always be a liar.
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Types of Liars

Blatant Liar-The most undisputable of all liars, this person fabricates the facts. Whether small or large details, this liar does not represent the truth with his words.

Half-Truth Liar-This liar tells partial truths, but either misrepresents the facts or only tells the part of the truth that is beneficial to his/her account (and lies about the parts that do not benefit him/ her.)

Convenience Liar-This is the liar who lies to please people or avoid conflict. This person often creates an answer that could be true, but really isn't yet. But it will potentially or could have potentially happened as described.

Exaggeration Liar-This is a common type of liar. So common that most won't even acknowledge it as such. "I caught a fish that weighed XX lbs..." "I make $_________ a year at my job."

Hindsight Liar-This liar looks back on his/ her account of a story and realizes that embellishment of the story will make it more interesting to the listener, more humorous or a generally better story. So the details are elaborated in hindsight in such a way that you recognize as a repeat listener, that the story changes with every recount.

Omission Liar-This liar tells complete truths. He/ she just doesn't tell all of them when recalling a story. For example, girlfriend to boyfriend: "A have dinner plans tonight with a friend..." Omission: "who I hooked up with all through college."

Back Where I Come From

There's a song that was written about the place where I grew up by a man named Mac McAnally. Mac grew up in the same little town as me, but it was about 30 years earlier.

He recorded this song first, I believe, but Kenny Chesney made it popular just a few years ago. Every time I hear this song, I'll admit that I get a little choked up because I can envision everything that Mac was talking about when he put those words down on paper. And while I can admit that I was glad to get out of that stifling, small-town mentality…well, there's always something special about going back.

I am going there today…back to where I come from. I haven't been in months, and it is weird to me that for the first time in years, I really miss that little dot on the map. Oddly enough, I am learning to appreciate the quirks and the narrow minded viewpoints that reside there. This little town has such a simple way of life and the important things are really important.

Now, I am sure I'll have at least one heated discussion with at least one family member about politics or religion or money--I always do. However, these are the people who made me who I am today. This is the place where I learned right from wrong and where all the foundations of my life were established.

Back where I come from is such a special place. I am proud to say that's where I come from.

The words below are the original lyrics to the song:

Back Where I Come From
Written by: Mac McAnally

In the town where I was raised
The clock ticks and the cattle graze
Time passed with Amazing Grace
Back where I come from

Now you can lie on a riverbank
Paint your name on a water tank
Or miscount all the beers you drank
Back where I come from

Back where I come from
Where I'll be when it's said and done
I'm proud as anyone
Back where I come from

We learned in Sunday school
Who made the sun shine through
I know who made the moonshine, too
Back where I come from

Blue eyes on a Saturday night
Tan legs in the broad day light
TV's, they were black and white
Back where I come from

Back where I come from
Where I'll be when it's said and done
I'm proud as anyone
Back where I come from

Some say it's a backward place
Narrow minds on a narrow way
I make it a point to say
That that's where I come from

That's where I come from
Where I'll be when it's said and done
I'm proud as anyone
That's where I come from

Back where I come from
I'm an old Mississippian
And I'm proud as anyone
That's where I come from
That's where I come from
That's where I come from

Corn Dog Day in the Cafeteria

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle wrote, "It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important." Sir, I couldn't agree more! People who can appreciate the importance of the little things in life are few and far between. Everyone talks about the big things -- the promotion, the new car, the wedding.

People forget to think about their new socks or the joy of missing all the red lights. However, I am not one of these people. I am a little things lover. I always have been.

I love the travel to a city as much as my vacation there. I love watching TV with my friends. I love lying on the couch and having someone play with my hair. I love knowing that I get to sleep in tomorrow morning and that when I get home my fridge is fully stocked. I also love for someone to bring me an unexpected "happy." Like this morning, I got a new chair for my desk at work. It's great--tons of levers, knobs and buttons. It’s a chair. Not a car. A chair. But I am genuinely happy about it.

Yes, if you show up at my house with new lip gloss, I am pumped. Bring me chocolate, and I am ecstatic. Surprise me with any small perk, and I am like a kid with a new puppy. Heck, even corn dog day in the cafeteria is enough to catapult my dreary Monday into a day to love.

Everyone should start thinking of the little things as important.

Recognize the sunset. Appreciate the extra ketchup in your McDonald's bag. Find your own equivalent to Corn Dog Day in the Cafeteria.